A Mom's Thoughts

Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary of Magdala. When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to his mother, “Dear woman, here is your son,” and to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” From that time on, this disciple took her into his home. (John 19:25-27)

During the two years Son #2 was in preschool, his front lip and teeth took regular beatings; concrete floors, playscapes, and other kids’ heads were quite regularly bashed against the lower front of his face. We wondered for a long time if his top baby teeth would be allowed to survive their natural life expectancy.

Eventually, the teeth did survive, and the “busted” lips all healed well. But, when I think about that time, one specific example of his poor face’s trials stands out. It was a beautiful, spring afternoon, and the boys and I were in the parking lot at Sam’s Club. We were getting out of the car when Son #2 fell out of the backseat onto the asphalt; he landed on his face. His front teeth badly cut his inner lip, his outer lip was also cut, his knees were abraded, and I wasn’t so sure about the future of one particular front tooth. Blood was everywhere. We cut short our trip and hurried home to ice packs, the comfort of cartoons, and his beloved friend, Bear-Bear.

Hours later, after all was calmer and Son #2 was munching ice like a trooper, I noticed my big toe. It had a huge blob of dried blood on it. I hadn’t even noticed it. Much later, when I knew Son #2 would be okay and when we had decided that stitches were not required, did I slow down enough to notice this reminder of the afternoon’s events. The first thought that came to me when I saw that dried blood was of Mary – THE Mary. Our trauma had been a small one, and I suddenly wondered what Mary had looked like at the end of that horrible day so many springs ago. I wondered how many dried blood spots she had on her body that she did not even notice because she was more concerned about the suffering of HER son. I thought of those agonizing hours along the Via Dolorosa as she followed her son as he carried his cross – as he carried the cross for all of us – and I could not imagine the terror in her heart that day. In the end, she stayed with her son, and she followed him and his pain until its final end as he hung on that cross. She stayed because, as his mother, she had no choice but to stay; she knew that the human son in him needed her to.

Ultimately and perhaps ironically, Mary teaches what parenthood is about: being selfless, giving to the needy, and seeing “it” through. As a result, she not only teaches about being a parent, but about being a Christian as well. As with her, we all are given the wonderful grace of knowing that, regardless of what we suffer along the way, we, too, will ultimately be taken care of – just as Jesus, even in his final moments, took care of her.

Dear Lord, help me today in bearing this huge responsibility of parenthood, and help me to walk with my children through their pains and trials. Give me the grace you gave Mary, as I work to put the focus where it belongs. Thank you for caring for me while I care for others. In your Son’s name I pray, Amen.